OK, you know the feeling. You have been thinking about something for months. Many months. The thing happens to be something you want to buy. You have passed on many of them that ‘could work’ in favor of holding out for just the right one. You have prayed about it. You have committed to yourself and your spouse that you would not do any unnatural acts to force the situation. You wait. And wait.
And then BAM! A new version of the thing comes along. Something is different about this one. It is the same as the others, yet somehow it is vastly different. It is not more beautiful; in fact in some place it is downright ugly. It is not a better design; in fact in some aspects it needs major work. Yet you are drawn to it. You keep coming back day after day just to look at it. You continue to look at others, but none of them compare anymore. This one simply feels right. It seems as though your prayers have been answered, and answered in the way you want them to be. You wait some more. You look at more things. You pray more. And still it calls to you.
This ‘thing’ I am talking about is not a bunch of new gadgets. It is not a new dress or pair of boots. It is not a new smart phone or exercise gear. It is not a new bicycle or even a new car. It is in fact, a new home.
You are moving. The question of whether to move or not seems to have already been answered. The move is going to happen. So you are looking for a home. In fact you have been looking for the new home for many months. And the one you keep coming back to has spoken to you since the first time you looked at it. You have been through finer homes. You have been through homes that fit all your needs and require zero work. You have been through homes costing more and those costing less than this one. Still, this one remains and you go back and stare at it – daily!
As you get ready to make an offer, you finally make the call. Not to your best friend, but to the mortgage broker. Then you talk to another. Then another. The answers are all the same; “I could get you into this house, but it will take some finesse and quasi-risky financing to make it happen. You recall the conversation you have had with your spouse; “We won’t do any unnatural acts to get into this home.” Sigh. BUT YOU REALLY WANT IT! You have waited for it. You have prayed. You looked. You waited more. This one is calling you. Isn’t this the one God wants you in?
So what do you do now? All the smart people around you are saying basically; “It is a stretch, but doing A, B, and C we can make it happen.” In other words, doing this on your own power and with your own intelligence, surely you can make this happen. But you know it is an unnatural act. You know this is not safe. It could, and likely would all work out. And then again it might not.
This is the scenario my wife and I are in right now, today, this afternoon. We came to only one conclusion. You know that nice cute saying about love; “If you love something let it go. If it comes back, it is yours. If it doesn’t, it never was.” While there are pieces of that I don’t like (the implication of possession being equated to love is just wrong…) but the concept is right. A few minutes ago Kathy and I prayed and gave this house back to God and then I immediately called the realtor and told him the same thing.
God has taken us on an amazing journey from California to the Idaho heartland. It is beautiful here and we are sure we will stay. This particular home truly did appear to us, using all our intelligence as well as our spiritual discernment, as the right place to be, the right house to make an offer on, the right place to call home. But it missed the mark on a very important piece of the puzzle. Not by much. We aren’t totally out of the ballpark by any means. Yet we made a commitment to ourselves and to our Lord not to do unnatural acts with our finances and we need to honor that.
So the house must go back to God. It is His. I know what it takes to get into it and so does He; and I am excited! The journey from Silicon Valley to Idaho has been one completely led by the Lord. For us to turn this property around and give it back to him at this time, well, yeah, we are bummed because it has all we want; but what if it comes back to us? How awesome is our God! And still, just like Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego said in Daniel 3 “Even if He does not save us, He is still our God and we will not serve your gods!” (my paraphrase).
I can’t lie, it hurts to give up something you want and have prayed for and waited so long for. I know that I could do something about it and “get into” the house. But what does God have planned for us? If I “get into” this house, I know the feelings I will have and the elation I will have. It is not my first home and I have experienced those before. But what will I experience when the pieces do fall in place and the perfect house does come along – not by my unnatural acts, but by His supernatural acts? Michelangelo painted his vision of creation – God giving to man. For today, I am reversing this image. Man is giving back to God so that God can do even greater things than this with it.
Wow. I can’t wait to write that blog!